Miss Daja

Author Archives: Miss Daja

Girl Talk Tuesdays || Get Out Of Your Own Way

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Happy Tuesday Ladies and the few gentlemen that peep – yes, I see you too. =)

I wanted to encourage you all today because this is a topic that I’ve struggled with for quite some time and I always say, if I’m going through it or have gone through it, I’m sure I am not the only one. We all have a burning desire to be great, do more, attain more.. but no matter how big our dreams are there is this little nagging spirit called fear. Fear has a mind of it’s own. The moment we speak life into our dreams and began to move on those dreams, fear sneaks in and creates doubt. We go from excitement to talking down on ourselves and thinking of everything that could go wrong. We create the problem that would probably never exist in the first place all with our thoughts.

That was me… On many occasions.

I’ve sat on dreams for years all because of fear of what could go wrong, fear of what others would think, would say, would do. Fear of not being accepted, not being taken serious and not living up to others expectations. I would shrink into this box of negativity all created by my own self doubt. And honestly the only person that suffered was myself because I would always think about those untouched goals. No matter what I would do, I was reminded of those dreams. Time would be wasted, I’m talking years and years… doubt then was met by disappointment which later turned into depression.

sigh.

It took a lot of pick me ups, tears and prayer to get me moving. I can’t remember the exact day I woke up from that fear and I won’t lie and say it doesn’t creep up on me every once in awhile but I will say this. Any time I have an ounce of motivation, I act on it. Anytime I am inspired or think to just do it, I do it. Because I know the moment will not always present itself and I want to take advantage of courage every chance I get. The reason for this post is to let you know that you are not alone. Don’t allow fear to cripple you because it’s a dark place to be in.

IF ANY OF YOU ARE LOOKING FOR WAYS TO STAY MOTIVATED, A FEW THINGS THAT WORK FOR ME ARE…

  • Have a trusted friend you can express yourself with. I have a close friend that knows exactly when I am overwhelmed and stressed. She always does her best to take the load off of my mind and put that encouraging word back into my heart.
  • Create a life of positivity by having reminders around your home and your daily activities. Ex: Set alerts on your phone that randomly pop up throughout the day that may say “keep going” “you are doing great” “Hello Beautiful” “giving up never got anything done”. Post positive sticky notes around your home so you walk into encouraging words. Trust me, it helps.
  • Vent. Have a journal or a type pad on your phone to jot down exactly what you are thinking while you are thinking it.
  • Rest. Relax. Release. Revamp. Take it easy. Don’t beat yourself up by these feelings because even the richest person has them. Relax and release those emotions whether you need to cry or simply sleep it off. Revamp yourself in an area that will make you feel a change (switching up your hair always does the trick).

Those are just a few ways that keep me in the right direction.

What are some things you do to get out of your own way.?

Do You Know What Today Is…

It’s our Anniversary, Bloggerversary!

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The most beautiful feeling is waking up knowing that you are living your purpose. I am so thankful to have a peace of mind in my work, to have a dedicated team, to have the support system that I do have to move forward daily in my goals. I know you all see less and less post from myself and I promise that is something I will get back into working on. I went from blogging daily to once or twice a week but spending more time trying to do work in my community to reach these young girls. No Boiz Allowed is bigger than a blog but that is where it all began and I won’t depart from it. From the Girl Talk videos, to the HERstory Interviews, #iAmBeautiful Campaign, Book Club, Eye Candy, Tips, Fashion Fridays, Music Mondays, Giveaways, Challenges, hustlHER (COMING SOON).. We are just getting started. Nonetheless, thank you thank you thank you for holding me down throughout the years. YOU ARE APPRECIATED!

I Am Beautiful Because….

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So remember the I Am Beautiful Campaign I’ve pumped up for the past two years? Well, I have a confession. I got scared and doubted myself so much that I hid all of my promo materials and never looked back until one day it literally fell out of my drawer as I was cleaning up and cleaning out my space to start the New Year fresh. I got a chill when I saw it again. It was time.

I made a few phone calls and all of the positive energy that was relayed to me from friends and family confirmed my exact feelings. It was time. So I moved on emotion and confidence immediately in case my worst enemy doubt and it’s best friend procrastination decided to creep up on me. Instead of me taking my next step to the net and social media, I decided to get a little more personal and speak directly to the youth in my Community, my own backyard. The young girls of Las Vegas. I was granted access to speak and hold a workshop at the Boys and Girls Club.

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What happened next was amazing…

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I pictured myself going in front of a class room with a chalkboard and a ruler and “teacher” a class about self love and what it means to love yourself. And although we dug deep in those subjects, it was less of a lecture and more of a girl talk movie night. We all sat down and asked each other questions. The girls were as honest and open as I would have imagined. Mentally I wasn’t prepared for the things I heard them expressing they go through at such a young age but who was I fooling. I was once in their shoes. I think that is why it was so easy for me to talk to them and be receptive of their expressions and feelings.

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Crown Me Queen – Women Empowerment Live Event

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In celebration of No Boiz Allowed’s 3 Year Anniversary, we have partnered up with Black Girls Inspired to present The Crown Me Queen Luncheon; a one day powerful networking and sisterhood conference, designed to gather all women, young and seasoned who are career driven and life lovers to celebrate all facets of being a woman. The goal of the luncheon is to empower the mind, strengthen the skill and polish every womans imperfections.

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At Crown Me Queen, we will share best practices, stories of success and experiences both personal and professional with a wider awareness of political, social and economic causes in order to help each woman reach her full potential in life. Our panel of speakers includes a variety of successful women from all genres of business and life.

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KEYNOTE SPEAKERS TOPICS:

The Self-Esteem Queen: How To Remain True To Yourself And Allow Your Individuatlity To Shine In A World That’s Telling You How You Should Be

The Business Queen: 5 Business Strategies Every Woman Must Master

The Selfless Queen: The Importance Of Women Building One Another Up, Supporting Each Other And Celebrating One Another

Stay Tuned for the announcement of Speakers.

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- FAQ – QUESTIONS YOU MAY ASK -

1. WHAT SHOULD I EXPECT?

At Crown Me Queen, you should expect to be surrounded in a room filled with women that you can relate to as well as women you can learn from both personally and professionally. You should expect to leave this Luncheon feeling empowered, motivated, feeling beautiful internally, and with more connections than you had before you arrived. You should expect to leave with the courage to WEAR YOUR INVISIBLE CROWN at all times, unapologetically.

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2. WHAT SHOULD I BRING?

Well for starters bring an appetite because our buffet style lunch will include a variety of tasty dishes. You may also want to bring your business cards because you will have a chance to network with other attendees during our Social Hour. Bring your camera so you can take unforgettable pictures while creating unforgettable memories and connections. Please, please, please bring your smile. You don’t want to get caught in the back of someone else’s photo with a sour face. Hey, it happens. Any electronic gagdets or the good ole Notebook to take notes. And bring a friend. She may need this just as much as you.

3. WHO WILL I MEET?

You will meet beautiful women with different backgrounds; Students, Teachers, CEO’s and Entreprenuers, Bloggers, Politicians, Lawyers, Doctors, Fashion Designers, Photographers, etc. You name it, she will be there, just be open to making these connections without passing judgement. We are all here to have a great time and help one another to success.

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4. WHAT IS INCLUDED WITH MY $25 TICKET PURCHASE?

Each ticket holder will receive catered lunch .. don’t worry, dessert too., gift bags with goodies, chances to win amazing prices and priceless connections.

5. TELL ME MORE!

The Crown Me Queen Luncheon will be held inside of Railhead located at the Boulder Station Hotel/Casino. Doors will open at 11:45am but will begin on time at 12NOON and end at 3PM. Dress the part by being comfortable in what makes you exactly who you are. Come prepared to Celebrate the 3 Year Success of No Boiz Allowed and have fun with the hosts of the day, Black Girls Inspired.

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We look forward to meeting you all and making these wonderful connections. Crown Me, Queen!

Any questions, please feel free to contact me directly at daja.noboizallowed@gmail.com

To purchase tickets CLICK HERE!

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Girl Talk Tuesdays – Dealing With Disappointment

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Disappointment can and usually will hit us at any given moment in our lives and while it’s normal to hear “it’s not what happens to you, it’s how you handle it”, the fact of the matter is, it doesn’t change the way we feel. Life happens and we are taught to be strong and just deal with it. But what if I told you that it’s okay to live in your moments whether good or bad. Because if you are going to grow through them, you have to actually go through them without faking how you feel for the comfortability of others.

Disappointment is being faced with the reality that does not meet our expectations.

The result of looking forward to something with faith and high hopes to only learn that it’s not what it was and not going to be what you thought it would. Feelings get crushed and the next question is now what?

I was faced with this ugly reality today and instead of me trying to be strong, I allowed myself to feel that moment for exactly what it was. I didn’t go off on a rage and I didn’t call a friend to complain, (completely by choice) but I did acknowledge my feelings and I was okay with being let down. In my mind it was another hurdle that I had to get over and I knew I wouldn’t allow myself to sit in sadness for long but I am happier because I didn’t fake my feelings when I felt them and I didn’t judge myself for them either.

My disappointment allowed me to get creative with what I had hoped to accomplish. I could’ve kept this to myself but I’m sure you’ve dealt with this feeling before to.

1. Don’t fake your feelings – acknowledge your feelings and be honest with yourself about how you feel. When we tell ourselves lies, we tend to believe them.

2. Express yourself through the good and the bad – of course this doesn’t mean to throw a temper tantrum when you don’t get your way but if you need to take a minute to yourself and pray, cry or write, this is a great way to release that bad energy you felt and move forward.

3. Get creative and find another way – the one way we hoped for didn’t work but that doesn’t mean it’s the end all be all. Find creative ways to get the job done or bring that joy back into your life.

WHAT ARE SOME WAYS YOU DEAL WITH DISAPPOINTMENT?