I compromised my confidence by comparing myself to others – Girl Talk Video

Tue, May 14, 2013 2 Comments by Miss Daja

For awhile I found myself feeling ~~empty~~ lost after spending excessive amount of time on Social Media. The internet is cool and Social Media is fun but I’ve found it to be entertainment when done in moderation. Focusing on the wrong things made it hard for me to be happy because although I felt like people were putting up a fake image, I just couldn’t help feeling depleted. It’s so easy to lose track of time and lose focus on what’s important when the world is all pointing the finger and telling you what’s hot, what’s not and why you’re not cool enough. Everything and everyone’s lives just seemed “perfect” and I couldn’t quite figure it out. Then I realized, it’s not you, it’s me.

I had to get over the hype of feeling like I “needed” to keep up and feel as though I wasn’t doing enough. In reality, I was burned out from doing too much. But compared to those I was focused on, it seemed as though I wasn’t doing anything. It didn’t hit me until I was applying for a position in the writing world that I saw all of my accomplishments on paper. I saw that my countless amount of hard work, time, dedication and lack of sleep meant something which amounted to the results I lived daily. In that moment I realized that the most important things to me weren’t on Instagram and many don’t see that part of my life. I realized I was good enough for exactly who I am and what I aim to become one day, so I decided to take a break from focusing on others and I began directing the attention back to me.

I decided to record this video for you and although there was only so much I could say in the allowed time, I knew if this was something I dealt with, someone had to have gone through it as well. Thankfully, I no longer spend time worrying about the who’s who unless she’s making a difference in someone else’s life. Then I would want to discuss how her role can join forces with us at No Boiz Allowed. But to those that are constantly fighting to keep up, sometimes it’s best just to keep still. A friend once said, get lost and find yourself. Well I did and I feel amazing with what I’ve found. How are you feeling?

Tagged Girl Talk, open discussion, Self Love

Getting To Know Myself || 50 Thought Provoking Questions To Ask Yourself

Sun, May 5, 2013 No Comments by Miss Daja

Have you ever sat back and realized that you don’t know yourself as well as you thought you did? Well, you’re not the only one. Thoughts run through our minds daily and we may not realize how much control we have over our minds but that is simply because we’re not always honest with ourselves. Give yourself a chance to ask the right questions honestly and your mind and possibly your actions will change. I’ve come up with 50 questions for you and I to ask ourselves so don’t be afraid to answer them. Your answers may scare you or simply motivate you. It’s up to you.

01. Who am I?
02. What am I passionate about?
03. What do I have to lose if I just did that one thing I’ve always wanted to do?
04. When was the last time I tried something new?
05. What is one change I can make about myself to bring more peace and happiness to my life?
06. Am I proud to tell people where I work?
07. When was the last time I was proud of myself?
08. What would I do differently if I knew others wouldn’t judge me?
09. Do I ask enough questions or do I settle for what I know?
10. How much of my spirituality plays a role in my life?
11. If I could choose one song to describe my life, what would it be?
12. Do the 5 people I spend the most time with reflect who I am, want to be and achieve in life?
13. What habits would I like to quit? pick up?
14. When do I feel the most inspired? (morning, night, after talking to a specific someone, etc)
15. Am I content with my current state of finances?
16. How can I make more money doing what I love?
17. What do I want more of in my life? (list it)
18. What do I want less of in my life? (list it)
19. What am I afraid of?
20. What and who makes me smile?
21. Did I do my best today?
22. Who would cry the most at my funeral?
23. What am I most grateful for?
24. Do I make people feel good about themselves?
25. Do I allow other people to talk to me the way I sometimes talk to myself?
26. Do I take the advice I tend to give?
27. Is there anything or anyone from my past that I need to let go of that is holding me back from my future?
28. If there were no limitations on money, how would I live my life?
29. What do I want to accomplish in 1 year, 3 years, 5 and 10 years?
30. How many times have I been in love?
31. What have I learned from each relationship?
32. What do I want in an ideal partner?
32. What are my best qualities?
34. When was the last time I said “no” to someone?
35. How important is other people’s opinions about me, to me?
36. Am I settling in life?
37. How much am I willing to sacrifice to make my dreams become my reality?
38. Do I tend to compare myself to others?
39. What does a perfect day for me consist of from morning to night?
40. What good qualities that the people I admire, share?
41. When is the last time I visited a doctor for a clean bill of health? (dentist, physical, eye exams, etc)
42. What has been my greatest achievement this far?
43. How do I want to leave this earth and be remembered?
44. What are my favorite hobbies?
45. What does happiness look like to me?
46. What is my deepest secret?
47. Am I a great friend to others?
48. Who are the 3 people who have had the greatest influence on me in the past and the 3 in the present?
49. Do I listen more to my heart or to my brain?
50. What has been the biggest change for me in the last 5 years?

If answered with 100% honesty, some of these questions just may spark a change in you. But you will never know until you do it.

Tagged Girl Talk, recommendations, Self Love

i AM – Learning to accept myself for who I am and love myself for who I am becoming

Sat, May 4, 2013 No Comments by Miss Daja

A few months ago I had a conversation with my grandma that put a spark in me. One that was never really there before. I was a little down and out about my situation at the time and was just venting to her because I tell her basically everything. She listened the whole time and let me vent to her about whatever was on my mind without saying a word. Then when I was finished she simply told me, smile and be happy for who you are, how far you’ve made it and who you’re becoming. Accept it. And another thing, whatever your situation is at the moment is only temporary but never lose yourself. If you’re used to making yourself happy by doing certain things, do them.

That was all I needed to hear. I’ve been learning to accept myself more and more and worrying less and less of the opinions of others. Yes, I want to make a great impression and be an influence but I will not do things that aren’t true to my authenticity. It was placed on my heart to share this with you. In case you needed to hear it. Smile and accept who you are and trust that the woman you are becoming is already wonderfully made.

Tagged Girl Talk, motivation, Self Love

Ladies, the moment you feel intimidated by man, read this!

Wed, April 17, 2013 No Comments by Miss Daja

There’s a rumor going around that boys are tougher than girls! Oh, please. Can you carry an 8pound baby in your stomach for 9 months and survive hours of labor? Can you cook, clean, and talk on the phone all at the same time? Can you bleed for a week and not die? Can you walk in 5 inch heels? Can you cry all night then wake up the next day like everything is okay?

Remember guys, WOMEN ARE ONLY HELPLESS UNTIL THEIR NAIL POLISH DRIES!

(I found this floating around on facebook and thought I would share)

Tagged Self Love

Are You Color Blind? Since When Did My Skin Tone Define My Beauty?

Sun, April 7, 2013 4 Comments by Miss Daja

Tagged BEAUTY, Confidence, Girl Talk, Self Love

No Boiz Allowed Presents 30 Days of Legs Spring Challenge #Nba30day #30daysoflegs #legsfordays

Mon, April 1, 2013 2 Comments by Miss Daja

30 Day Legs For Days Challenge
Are you ready for Spring? If not, don’t worry. There is still time to get right for the summer. But before summer arrives join us for the month of April in our Legs For Days Challenge. Each day in the month of April, you will dig through your wardrobe and find an outfit made to show off those sexy legs. You are not limited to just skirts and dresses. In fact, it’s up to you to be creative but remember, your legs must be shown. Pull out those shorts, mix and match your prints, and jazzy up those legs. It’s time to show up and show out. This challenge is suitable for any woman. And yes, we had the 9-5ers in mind too.

WINNER: Since this is a challenge, there will indeed be a winner. The winner goes to the lady who completes the most out of her 30 days. Just in case there is a tie, because this is reality and ties happen way too often… We will choose the top 2 winners and there will be a vote off. Yes, a vote off, of your 7 best looks. The No Boiz Allowed viewers will have a chance to vote on their faves and that will determine the winner. The winner will receive a special Spring gift from one of our favorite online boutiques. We will announce the prize soon.

DEADLINE: This challenge is from April 1st – April 30th.
1 winner will be announced on May 4th. If we go into a vote off, the winner will be announced on May 11th. All photos must be submitted by and no later than May 2nd.

RULES: Simply tag #NBA30day on Instagram or Twitter. You may tag us each day, create a collage and tag us each week, etc. or simply email us in your photos as you go or at the end of the month. Email is as follows nba30day@gmail.com All photos must be current (in the month of April). Although your birthday outfit was hot last month, it doesn’t count.

GOAL: The idea of this challenge is to get you out of your comfort zone and comfortable in the skin you are in by embracing your sexiness.

FUN: Post this challenge on your blog, instagram, twitter and spread the word. We want more ladies than ever to participate so tag your friends, email them and challenge them to join in with you.

If you have ANY questions, please feel free to contact daja.noboizallowed(at)gmail(dot)com or nba30day@gmail(dot)com

Tagged BEAUTY, Confidence, fashion, motivation, Self Love

Don’t lose yourself. – Motivation

Tue, March 5, 2013 2 Comments by Miss Daja

THE WOMAN THAT CAN CREATE HER OWN JOB IS THE WOMAN THAT WILL WIN!
EXPAND YOUR MIND, SUCCEED IN YOUR CAREER AND FALL IN LOVE WITH YOURSELF BEFORE YOU BEGIN TO SEEK A MAN AND WHAT HE CAN DO FOR YOU.
WE LOVE HARD AND SOMETIMES WE FORGET WHO WE ARE. SO IF THINGS DON’T WORK OUT, WE’RE COMPLETELY GONE. TO PREVENT THAT, YOU MUST
TAKE CARE OF YOU FIRST.!.

Tagged motivation, Self Love

Gratitude Jar! What Are You Thankful For?

Sun, February 24, 2013 4 Comments by Miss Daja

Tagged art, Self Love

Dear Young Girl,

Sun, February 24, 2013 1 Comment by Miss Daja

First of all, I want to start off by telling you that being a young lady is a beautiful gift. Not only are we able to become anything we want to be in life but we are also able to create life. I want to let you know that your confidence, self respect, and self esteem are key components to truly knowing yourself. Most women (and I say this including myself), have a bad habit of allowing others (mainly men) to control our moods and emotions. But we must take back that control. It’s time that we give ourselves the credit, the ability, and the courage to know who we are and what we are able to do with our power. 1.Listen to your parents. If your parents aren’t good role models, find a mentor or a figure that has a positive influence on you. One that when speaking, can grasp all of your attention and make you want to get out into the world and make a difference in someone else’s life. 2.Practice the gift of giving. I promise you it will come back when you least expect it. 3.I want you to wake up being thankful for that bed you slept in. 4.I want you to look yourselves in the mirror and smile when you see your reflection.

I know you are at the age where peer pressure is at an all time high. It seems as though all of the cool kids get a lot of attention but I want to let you know that you don’t have to be popular to stand out. You are already amazing and one of a kind by truly being yourself. I want to let you know that whatever circumstances you are facing in this world, y o u a r e n o t a l o n e. I want you to understand that as a lady, you have the right to express yourself. It’s okay to laugh at your own jokes. It’s okay to cry when you are feeling sad. Because to truly express these emotions means that you are living. Once you realize that you are living, you will indeed become grateful and realize your true purpose in life.

Hold your dreams close to your heart and don’t ever let anybody take that away from you. It only takes for you to believe in yourself before you make positive and purpose filled steps toward your future. Follow your intuition, not your friends. If something doesn’t sit well with you then it probably isn’t good for you. Do not ignore your gut feelings. And most importantly, choose your company wisely. The people we spend the most time with have the power of pursuasion. If they aren’t making you happy and/or a difference in your life or others, then they are probably wasting your time. I am proud of you thus far young girl. Until next time…

Tagged Self Love

Self Love Is The Best Love – Shanel Cooper-Sykes

Wed, February 13, 2013 No Comments by Miss Daja

YOU COOK FOR HIM. Clean for him. Spend your time, energy and money on him. Give your body & mind to him. Pull out your best tricks in the bedroom. Run errands for him. Take care of his kids. Put up with his B.S. Do things you know you don’t want to do. You deal with his flaws. Pause your own dreams so he can live his. Forgive him time after time. You listen to him. You’re patient with him. You respect him. Believe in him. And LOVE every ounce of his soul.

Wonderful things for a woman to do!!!

>>>BUT THIS IS A SET UP FOR FAILURE & MISERY if you don’t do it for YOU FIRST!!! You can not pour into a man ( or anybody ) from an empty cup. You will always feel undervalued, sad, and frustrated UNTIL you learn to love you FIRST<<<